Some thoughts.

Strangest things said to me today: My sister told me that I am not who she thought I was. Now considering I've known my sister for as long as I've been alive, that statement took me by complete surprise and confused me just a wee bit. I asked her "what do you mean?" The answer isn't even worth putting up, because in short, she couldn't explain it to me.

That got me thinking, aren't people allowed to change? There is a statistic out there that says that most people change their professions about 5 times in a lifetime. Granted that might have been before all this post-secondary business where you go in with nothing and come out with a degree in Mathematics or Science or something else and are expected to find work in the field that you studied in.

There has been TONS of talk about sexual fluidity lately, it's like a scientific explanation for why some people are gay, straight, bisexual, transgender, queer, asexual, and others that I don't know. Do we need to label sexuality or is it just a process of finding yourself. The stories go both ways, straight for 20 years and one morning they walk up gay, gay for 40 years and one day you met that perfect person in the opposite sex. Would it be wrong to call people fluid?

I'm always amazed when people from a very young age know what they want to do and have their entire life plan set out. I had a friend in junior high who knew where and when she wanted to be married, have her first kid, be proposed to, along with a million other things. I've recently come to appreciate not setting boundaries for myself, or to set light ones, ones that bend and move so that if something unexpected happens - which most likely will, especially when you don't expect or want it to... - that I can just kind of go with the flow and adjust accordingly.

I've also meet people who are on the other end of the spectrum, they're so carefree and casual about events that I envy them, because they allow themselves to live without limitations. I think to myself, I want to be like THEM! and then I think about it some more and realize that no, I don't want to be like them, I just want a tiny piece of what they have.

Anyways, after reading through this I realize that all my thoughts are jumbled up and this post is everywhere and nowhere at the same time. :P I guess that's how I feel today. I'm a bit tired, a bit emotionally spent and it's getting close to bed time.